Emotional regulation

• May not be able to identify their physical internal state (interoception), for example hungry, thirsty, hot, cold, butterflies in their stomach when anxious.
• May struggle to identify in themselves and others the basic feelings of happy, sad, angry, scared.
• May not be able to identify and indicate to others how they are feeling.
• May not have the appropriate vocabulary to label basic or more complex feelings and emotions in themselves and others; instead, may communicate these feelings via behaviour and/or actions.
• May struggle to manage mild stress, for example waiting for their turn in a game.
• Is unable to regulate themselves without an adult to co-regulate with them, possibly leading to unsafe behaviours.
• May not have strategies to self soothe.
• May not be able to manage overly intense emotions safely, including feelings of excitement, without being triggered into fight, flight or freeze.
• May be unable to make decisions and access their ‘thinking brain’ during times of distress.
• May not always stop and reflect on possible consequences before acting.
• May not be able to use self-talk and internal thinking to support emotional regulation, for example recalling an event where they experienced similar feelings and reflecting on what they did to regulate themselves.
• May not understand that uncomfortable feelings can be tolerated and will ease over time and are not always able to imagine themselves in the future in a calmer state of mind.
• May not always be aware that some behaviour is risky and may be dangerous and unsafe.
• May present as ‘shut down’ and refrain from engaging with others, refusing to acknowledge feeling difficult emotions.
• May react to unseen triggers.
• May engage in dangerous behaviour such as leaving the school site.
• May not be able to identify their physical internal state (interoception), for example hungry, thirsty, hot, cold, butterflies in their stomach when anxious.

You may also find the receptive language and expressive language information in the communication and interaction section of the framework useful.

Based on need, some of this provision will be effective.

• Look for patterns and triggers. Complete regular observations throughout the day to consider environmental factors such as time of day, lesson, staff, peers, classroom etc. It may also be helpful to RAG-rate timetables.
• Explicitly teach self-regulation techniques. Implementation is supported using adult modelling, reinforced with visuals, for example 5-point scale, breath work, proprioceptive movement or heavy work (Primary), heavy work (Secondary), mindfulness, exit cards, cognitive breaks and activities. Learners are supported to understand the types of activities that supports their emotional regulation to develop their own toolkit which, in time, they can use independently.
• Planned interoception strategies are used that develop children and young people’s interoception skills required to be ready to learn.
• Explicit teaching of emotional vocabulary – supporting students to match the appropriate vocabulary to the corresponding internal sensations. They are taught how to communicate with others in a way which does not provoke a defence response and are provided with scales, metaphors or language to indicate to others how they are feeling, for example feeling scales, emotion wheels, emotion fans, blob trees, photographs, visual prompts.
• Support the child or young person to monitor their own understanding of their emotions and employ strategies to overcome overwhelm, using a resource such as The Comprehension Monitoring section of ‘Language for Behaviour and Emotions’.
• Provide access to low stimulus or calm areas for parts of the day to support regulation either planned as a proactive part of the child or young person’s daily routine or as and when necessary to co-regulate alongside an adult. An exit card and access to trusted adults who are skilled at regulation may support the use of this.
• Key adults support the child or young person to make simple selections or choices using visuals, when struggling to regulate emotions.
• Support identified sensory processing and integration needs through carefully planned activities. See the sensory processing and intergration section of the framework for suggestions.
• Connect first, before responding. Adults carefully consider their response when a child or young person is displaying distress. Notice what is happening, making sure the adult is regulated before responding.
• Validate and attune to feelings and emotions. Once connected, show curiosity and understanding by modelling thinking through the child’s emotional response, for example ‘I wonder if that was tricky for you because…’, ‘I wonder if you were feeling ….’, ‘It’s hard when…’, using a ‘name it to tame it’ approach. Validate by connecting via acceptance and empathy, using PACE. Attune to the child or young person’s feelings by meeting their emotional intensity, resisting the urge to minimise or dismiss their feelings.
• Create and practise exit plans to move away from overwhelming situations or environments are created, practised and reviewed alongside children and young people. This may be supported by a risk assessment.
• Remain curious. Consider applying the ‘HALT’ concept as a tool, to remind adults that when children and young people are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired, they may struggle to make good decisions and/or become distressed. Therefore, it is beneficial to ensure children have access to snacks when required, adults are curious around how the child or young person may be feeling, there are regular opportunities to connect with key adults and ensuring, where possible, the child or young person is getting adequate rest periods throughout the day. It is also important to be curious around if the child or young person is possibly feeling unwell and the impact this may be having on behaviour.
• Teach children and young people about the emotional brain and its responses. Dr Dan Siegel’s ‘Hand Model of the Brain’ can be used to provide the child or young person with a model that demonstrates what is happening in the child or young person’s brain when their big emotions overwhelm them, causing distress.
• Use ‘Open’ Passive Intervention and Prevention Strategies (PIPS), to be able to support staff in developing a consistent, effective and acceptable team approach to managing behaviour, while, crucially, maintaining positive relationships and minimising risk for all.
• Provide children and young people with a safe, significant adult in school. Use the Attachment Based Mentoring Programme to provide relational support through coaching and mentoring.
• Develop the use of relational support plans and responsive co-regulation plans, which outline how the child will be co-regulated by adults at all stages of dysregulation as well as identifying support the child needs when in crisis.
• Develop awareness of emotions. Emotion Coaching may be used as an approach to support.
• Support children and young people to connect with unresolved feelings affecting their behaviour. Therapeutic stories may be used to help.
• Support emotional intelligence through the use of personal development tools such as Emotional Logic.
• Support children and young people to understand and deal constructively with anger. A Volcano in My Tummy: Helping Children to Handle Anger and other activities, can be used.
• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Workbooks can be used to support primary and secondary aged pupils with managing anger (Primary, Secondary and beyond).

Support services

• Devon’s Social, Emotional Mental Health Team
• Children and Family Health Devon referral form for Neurodiversity, Mental Health and Mental Health Support Team in Schools (MHST), sensory and Speech, Language and Communication.

Further reading and information

• Sensory processing and integration – resources for schools
• ‘The Whole Brain Child’ – Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
• ‘Simple stuff to get kids self-regulating in school’ – Lauren Brukner and Lauren Liebstein Singer
• ‘Improving Sensory Processing in Traumatised Children: Practical Ideas to help your child’s movement, co-ordination and body awareness’ – Sarah Lloyd

Resources to share with parents

• Sensory processing and integration – resources for parents
• The Whole Brain Child – Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
• Dr Dan Siegel’s Model of the Brain video
• The Kid’s Guide to Staying Awesome and In Control By Lauren Brukner
• The Explosive Child book for parents Dr. Ross Greene
• Connective Parenting Model (NVR) – Sarah Fisher
• Non-Violent resistance- Haim Omar